'My wife and I thought life #insurance was a joke - then she died in a car crash'

In the weeks after his wife's death in November 2012, Ben, a PR firm boss, was so caught up in his grief that money was 'so far' from his mind.

The 36-year-old didn't even remember that Desreen had taken out a life insurance policy until his financial adviser told him shortly after the deadly smash.

But thanks to the cover, three-and-a-half years on, the dad-of-one is able to work on a part-time basis, allowing him to spend valuable time with Jackson.

He also owns a house and has enough spare hours to write his blog, Life As A Widower, which he started to help other widowers through the grieving process.

"Most people don't like to think about what would happen if they died," Ben told the Mirror Online in an exclusive interview.

"We can't talk about it. We think we are kind of invincible, especially when we're young. No-one ever wants it [death] to happen. But it does happen. I'm living proof of that."

Thanks to life insurance, Ben is able to work on a part-time basis, allowing him to spend valuable time with Jackson

He added: "It's not just about the money, it's about having options. The money has paid for the house Jackson and I live in now and allows me to work part-time.

"I am able to be with my son and grieve.

"People think that if they don't have life insurance cover, something would happen. The truth is nothing would happen, there would be no-one there with a magic wand."

Speaking about the effects of his wife's death on their now-five-year-old son, Ben said the youngster is 'sad a lot' and upset that 'he can't see his mummy again'.

"But in general, he is a happy little boy," he said. "We still have our ups and downs."

The widower added that Jackson has become much more vocal about death following the crash, which occurred after an elderly driver mistook his car's accelerator for its brake.

The little boy understands that it is 'really final', he said.

However, because of his wife's life insurance policy, Ben said he has had the chance to make many happy memories with Jackson in the years since the tragedy.

Desreen was killed after retired stockbroker Geoffrey Lederman, 85, mounted the pavement in his classic Mercedes

The widower's comments come as a new study reveals nearly half of British parents do not have life insurance.

The research by the Institute of Inertia - a partnership between comparethemarket.com and the University of Sheffield - also shows that a huge 44 per cent have never discussed the financial implications of death with their partner.

Despite having a young son together, Ben said it wasn't until his and Desreen's 'hands were forced', when his wife set up her business, that they even thought about life insurance.

“We had both completely avoided any thoughts of our deaths, and therefore getting life insurance for the first 18 months of our son’s life, until our arms were forced when Desreen set up her own business," he said.

"We looked at the policy and thought, 'no we don't need that'. It seemed like a waste of time and money, something we were never going to benefit from.

"Even then, when we were talking about something so serious, we joked about it."

During the conversation in spring 2012, Ben said his spouse jokingly suggested to him: "Why don’t you get the cover now and I’ll do it later when the money starts coming in?"

Ben said it wasn't until his and Desreen's 'hands were forced' that they thought about life insurance

He sarcastically replied to her: "So if I die you’re sitting pretty with my personal life insurance and death in service through work, but if anything happens to you, I’m screwed?"

Desreen 'giggled naughtily behind her hands' to his comment, Ben writes on his blog, adding she eventually 'conceded and signed the papers'.

"We got it and forgot about it," he said.

Eight months later, Ben and Desreen were walking home through upmarket West Hampstead with Jackson when an elderly driver mistook the pedals of his classic Mercedes.

Retired stockbroker Geoffrey Lederman, 85, mounted the pavement on the wrong side of the road, before crashing into a number of pedestrians, a court heard.

Desreen was killed in front of her horrified husband and son, while a young American student suffered brain damage and lost her sight in one eye.

Lederman was jailed for 18 months for causing death by dangerous driving following the crash on November 10, 2012. His sentence was later cut to 12 months on appeal.

After coming to the realisation that his wife had taken out life insurance, Ben said he assumed it would take years for him to receive any money.

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